Another Year of growth

This past year has been nothing but growth for me and my business.

2024 – 2025 A year of Change

Last Summer, in 2024, my then fiancé and I were living in another part of town. We were finding ourselves in more and more difficulties with our relationship and just in general with outside sources. Our family was full of health obstacles to face, between asthma, autism, PMDD, anxiety, and PTSD. And so, we were suffering financially as well as some relationship struggles. We lived a complicated life, but, I appreciated all we had. I think we really came to some kind of climax of health things going on in 2024. And, we were overcoming them. That whole process, I think was the bridge to moving across town into a better financial housing space, but, ultimately after a year there, where we ended our relationship.

At the peak of Summer, I ended our 5-year relationship as I found myself at the losing end of a lot of scenarios within our relationship. I had been putting my time into my fiancé’s business in hopes we would grow it into something more, something that would be ours. However, it never seemed to matter the amount of work I put forth. Parenting was always a struggle as we both had different approaches and seldom agreed. Usually, it was more of an agree to disagree and move on. I became more and more detached. Nothing it seemed was ever ‘ours’ and the family we were maintaining was similar. Everything seemed so separate, and she was ok with that. I tried to express myself and my concerns but was met with deliberation and a devaluing perspective that continually made me feel like a villain for expressing anything. I finally decided that I was too lonely to be in a healthy relationship. That if the person I chose was ok with that, then I was in the wrong relationship. You can only express your feelings and have them ‘stuffed back down your throat’ so many times before you begin to believe the person you’re in love with doesn’t really care.

Atleast, that’s what it was for me, thing after thing piling up in the relationship and never being resovled in a way that made me feel really good. Speaking on business, as health issues arose and we needed to stay home, having a business were we can be our own boss and write our own schedule had been essential for our success. However, regardless of the great, helpful schedule, we just weren’t making the appropriate money, in my mind. And the only possible ventures were for me to take on everything. Well, that got old really quick.

In the end, I made the most desperate decision I could, and I decided to leave my fiancé. One, if not the hardest decision I’ve ever made in my life. I loved that woman deeply and to have to be in a position to not choose her and know it would no longer be an ‘us’ life, well, it sucked the life out of me. I told a friend I’m not really all that sad, cause I cried a lot of tears in the relationship, but I am sad and angry. Ultimately though, I am ready to start this next journey of my life. Learn how to be single again and how to be a business owner on my own. Now, here in my 40’s and starting over, again.